Juggle

I have been doing lots of juggling lately...work, training, school stuff. I have done it all before but it seems that its compounded with stress. Trying to do my best. I got sick a couple of weeks ago first a cold then sinus, and achy all over. Unfortunately it freaked me out.  With everything going on i have done a great deal of second guessing myself. Confidence seems low. Bummed that i am not doing all the things i should be. Today though exhausted i feel well enough to go hit stuff. Hoping it helps distress. All in all i feel overwhelmed in a sea that i am trying to float upon. I know things can and will be better. Just have to take thing a day at a time. Being sick freaks me out, being scared of failing at something freaks me out. I am doing my best to not let it cloud me and it becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Things are not all gloom and doom. Have.had some bright spots. Some compliments at work, watching the karate kids do well in testing, and teaching has been rewarding.
Guess i just need to vent the negative so i can release it, and remember the positive so that its something i can hold onto.

Full time school

Ah last couple of days have been crazy. Hectic at work trying to get to the school...and not feeling well. Who gets a sore throat in June? Commuting has sucked as Ava is in the shop. Hoping she is out soon. We are six days npw at the school and first day went ok. Now we need people. In other news i am close to finishing up my continuing education for LEED. I will be glad when its done. Work is.now offering an incentive prpgram for taking the ARE. Now i have more incentive to get this done one and for all.  Things have been busy but good.

Onward

Ah. Done teaching at the after-school program.  Now just have to be there for testing, but that's no biggie.  SO glad its over.  It was very trying for me.  At times I question myself as a teacher and why I did Martial Arts in the first place. Luckily for me, I've had some really good experiences teaching at the Peabody dojo, so I haven't lost all hope.

Now its onto the next thing.  I need to finish logging in all my requirements to keep my LEED certification, for one.  Its so I can keep it without having to re-test. I will NOT want to go through that again. I'm more than halfway done, so that is easy.

Than what is next?

I'll be continuing to train, teach if need be, and maybe finally studying for the ARE - FOR REAL.

In the back of my mind, I do want to fight again, but I need to look/feel stronger.  That will take time.  I'm thinking I can do all that while working, and running the school.  We shall see. 

I just need for my studying to be in the forefront. Just really need to get these over with once and for all.

So I'm look forward to a productive summer.
Its a BIG step for our school going to 6 days/ week.  
I'm really hoping it takes off.

...Anyway...one step at at time.

Hectic Times

Wow, it has been hectic.  Nice to get a few minutes to breathe and of course update the blog.

A couple of weeks ago I taught on Saturday, then on Sunday took a few of our Karate kids to a tournament. They did very well and I was so proud of them. Its so great to see these kids improve, do well, and earn their achievements.

I also participated.  In weapons forms it was just the guys, and they combined it.  Another guy was intermediate like myself and decided to compete advanced (brown belt). So I did as well. If he can do it, so should I.

I ended up in a 2nd place tie, with the brown belt and had to do the form again.  Made an error and was bumped the 3rd. AH!

As for the hand kata there were 5 women so it was just us ladies.  I did my thing, and landed 3rd place.  I really wish I did better like I know I can. 

I couldn't believe how nervous I felt, it was almost as bad as when I had to fight.  It think it was because the parents were there....

Jeff asked how I felt, and I was indifferent. I know I can do better and I know I should have done better. Hopefully it sets a fire for me for the fall.

Work has been insane, with working long hours for various deadlines.  I've had to miss a couple of classes and it bums me out.  I am really hoping all this hard work pays off come 'salary talk time'

Meanwhile we have firmed up our plans for the summer for the school. Now we have to get our marketing underway and hope for the best.

It'd be so great to get in more people over the summer.  I want the decision to stay at 6 days a week to be and easy one.

With working so much my body crashed over the weekend and its be telling me to be careful. So I made sure to have some down time and will this weekend after I teach on Saturday

Just a few more classes to teach at the Eliot, then our Summer Schedule starts in Peabody. Big times ahead!

Forever Ago

Seems like forever ago since posting. Kept telling myself, ah later. Well maybe now is a good time with a day off.

Here are some updates:

Work has been up and down with busy stuff. Nothing too crazy. I've had my reviews and they seemed to go ok. I've been trying to take on more, and do more.  I've also considered testing once and for all. I started last month, had a huge burst of study in me and then lost it.  I kind of thought I would with all that has been going on. I need to somehow make it a priority.

Teaching ups and downs. The after-school program is incredibly challenging.  Our dojo however has been doing really great. The kids are doing good and I've seen so much growth in them. Last Saturday I burst into tears watching them. They make me so proud.  We have some big things coming up with the kids and the school. Its nerve wracking and exciting all at the same time.  

First, next weekend I teach again and then on Sunday we have tournament. I am taking the kids solo, and competing.  Its been awhile since I have competed, and I've not done it as an Intermediate.  I know its going to be a crazy day, and I'm hopeful that it goes smoothly.  Next up, is promotions in June.  My testing is pretty flexible, since I am the only adult. But, I've got my sights set on testing with the kids, and doing well.  I'm working on what I've termed "Black Belt hands". I want it so that if someone looks at just my hands it will be undeniably 'Black Belt material'  The kicks are further behind, they are getting better, and its just a matter of time.  Right now I'm trying to catch them up to 'Blue Belt material'. 

As I set my sights on 'Black Belt', it's great to have the advantage that due to other training, I already know the rank. Its just getting them to be 'Black Belt' sharp. Goal: Black Belt by 35.  Its going to be close.

In June we also go to 6 days a week. Right now we are working on our strategy and hopefully it goes well.

When June hits I also will try to get my studying into higher gear, as well as work on getting stronger. I'm going to keep working on my other stuff, and keep them sharp. Maybe (and that is  a BIG maybe) I will fight once more at the end of this year.  It's not a huge priority, but I want to keep up the work so that if I want to, I can.

Other than that I got to meet my precious niece  and visit family last month. That was a good time.  Spending time with them is always worth the trip. I am not sure when I'll be back, but I am hoping soon..

Anyway, that is the five minute update in the past few months. 

I'm going to try to post more.... 

When I start my journey on getting stronger I really want to post more, and post on progress. Maybe even pics. I know I will be unhappy with the ones as first, but need them to have a reference for later...

PS. Next Monday is my 4 year anniversary with taking back my life, and getting rid of soda and sugar. =)

Seminar

This weekend I participated in a 6 hour Seminar with 4 time World Champion Chantel Ughi.

Still incredibly sore, but I had a good time.  Only have a couple of pics, but here you go.

Me and Chantel

Group Photo
(which one is different from the rest?)

"IF"

"VIDEO"

IF you can keep your head when all about you 

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, 

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, 

But make allowance for their doubting too; 

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, 

Or being lied about, don't deal in lies, 

Or being hated, don't give way to hating, 

And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise: 

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; 

If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; 

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster 

And treat those two impostors just the same; 

If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken 

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, 

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, 

And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools: 

If you can make one heap of all your winnings 

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, 

And lose, and start again at your beginnings 

And never breathe a word about your loss; 

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew 

To serve your turn long after they are gone, 

And so hold on when there is nothing in you 

Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!' 

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, 

' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch, 

if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, 

If all men count with you, but none too much; 

If you can fill the unforgiving minute 

With sixty seconds' worth of distance run, 

Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, 

And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!